Napalm strike! Haha!

Most bombs are pretty sick if you really think about it. Okay, a lot of the people killed are evil Iraqi soldiers, fair enough there then, but there's a lot of innocent people killed, quickly. Okay maybe not innocent (they are Iraqi, remember!) but still - the point I'm making is in the instant way they kill.

A quick kill is a selfish kill - it gives the victim no time to think things over in a quick flashback style. That's why the napalm bomb was invented. It really was an innovation in thoughful, humane killing.

It's a fair kill because it's expected (We give 24 hours notice) and they also get "burning time", to think about their life and that. A bit of time to sit down with some mates and talk about the good times. After that though, Sizzle! Mmm, bacon! Haha! (I don't really eat them!)

Late last year we went on a daytime mission to take out a farm in North Iraq. The farm's produce was obviously a huge threat to us, so we needed to cut them off. (Not literally - we use guns and bombs rather than swords - gay!)
As we approached the farm we counted the workers there - seven. We had to get low to be accurate with the bomb and get a good spread. 30 seconds later and the bomb was dropped. The farmers lit up comically as they caught fire, and began to mull their last thoughts.

I heard a shout from one of the farmers as he considered how he'd lived his life.

"Mustapha Hadji Matata!"

I got the translator onto this when we got back. It was the Iraqi form of acceptance, or more commonly simply "thank you".

It's always good to see our unselfishness is appreciated.